Friday, October 29, 2004 . 1:19 AM

Spent the day home.. tried to study again but didnt get much out of it.. nonetheless i'll still chiong.. will be loggin in maple alot lesser for these few days all the way until thursday.. received the results 2dae.. by mail that is.. sms one long time ago receive already.. but lookin at the slip re-consolidates my concerns.. which is to finish poly asap.. get that diploma.. and not waste my parent's money..

sch matters aside.. its henry's bdae le.. 29/10.. happy bdae to u henry (thats if u're readin this) haha.. i was considering whether to go out wif u all to celebrate on friday.. but i had other appointments.. so nvm la hor.. hehe..

i'll be sleeping alot earlier today as compared to most other days ever since holidays started.. perhaps i'm really getting exhausted le.. physically.. but i'm mentally dead le.. i tried talking to someone but it seems she so coincidentally had to sleep early.. much earlier den on other days.. i might b jumping to conclusions but to me this behavior seems quite similar to avoiding people.. i was told by a fren that guys being emotional is fine.. but just dont overdo it.. well.. i'm not.. i'm just a guy whose been driven crazy by the stress of life.. searching for solitude only to be greeted in a not-so-warm manner..

well.. i'll be going back to TP.. to play badminton in about 14hrs time.. i gotta thank cheekeen.. this game might allow me to let loose some tension.. and work out a gd sweat.. the rain's been making me all sloppy.. even my original plan of goin swimming seems to be abit threatened by the rain.. coz i dun wanna risk swimming halfway den lightning strike.. better safe den sorry rite.. might go jogging after sup paper's over.. coz i'll be in a much much much lighter mood..

Tuesday, October 26, 2004 . 3:22 AM

Hmm.. been a so-so day 2dae.. Played maple.. Den Tianming asked me inside there whether wanna join him and his frens for dinner.. Stating that very long nvr eat dinner together le.. So i thought why not ^^.. So it was me,tianming,huixian,aggie.. supposed to go over bedok 85 there eat.. tmd close.. everyone jitao "diao 85 got close de meh".. -_______-" faces all over.. so after some discussion.. decided to walk over to bedok interchange de kopi tiam eat lor.. talked abit.. luffed alot.. ate quite little.. not coz we buy little.. coz serving little.. den while i'm typin this i feelin so hungry liao.. and tianming eatin wif his bro at this moment i'm typin this..

highlight of the day.. you guys know the funland arcade at bedok right?? beside there got the indian movie theatre?? ok?? visualize le ma?? we walked past that when we were gaigai-ing after dinner.. den i noticed one very nice movie.. "I know wat you did last raya".. -_____________________________-"""""""""""""""""" ... i ask tianming see.. he oso same face.. wa lau.. wth is this.. i hate kay lengs already ok.. (kay leng = indian).. okok just those smelly ones and perverted ones.. hate those ALOT.. wont proceed to say how i whacked one years back =D.. back to topic.. "I know wat you did last RAYA".. PENGGGGGG... BWGGGGGG... -________- okok i no nd to say further u all shld noe hw i feel le.. haha.. after that.. departed about 10pm i guess.. ming and xian go take bus home le.. den me & aggie took mrt.. lols.. found out we both same age.. same sch though diff course.. but she grad le la.. i final yr nw oli coz i retained 1yr in sec sch.. other than that same le.. lols.. she dropped of at kallang.. den i dropped at dhoby ghaut.. go find my mei workin at parklane.. but b4 that played 2 games of DM10 at the new ZoneX.. went over den use free com awhile den left there abt 1am.. abit late.. so bopian take taxi le.. den wan giv her abit $ she dowan.. =( so i dropped off first.. den nw i bloggin le.. later mayb maple awhile more den koon le.. i dun feel like kooning.. haiz.. i'm trying to gather confidence that i'll do fairly gd for my sup paper.. tts abt all for nw i guess.. haha.. enuff typin le.. nx part is for my laopo.. if u not my laopo dun read hor!! close ur eyes!! NOW!!.. wahah jk jk.. =P

laopo.. if u readin this.. I MISS U ALOT.. SO LONG NVR MIT U LE I WAN DIE LIAO.. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH............................ *sobz*

Sunday, October 24, 2004 . 3:25 AM

Sian sian another day spent at home.. or most of it.. Went out abt 8-11pm.. walk walk breathe fresh air.. Oh.. If anyone notices any changes in anyway i'm behaving.. i dont know to tell u guys not to worry or to just ignore me.. i dont even noe wat to type in this entry nw.. can type one line and erase over and over again.. almost like wat tian ming does.. read thru his blog b4 posting in my own.. There's too many things going thru my mind and my heart.. emotions going haywire.. Bah.. Is my existence meaningful?? I dont seem to be helping anyone.. Or mayb its just i'm useless when it comes to helping pple.. Anyone out there miss me?? I dont know.. i've been sneezing.. On another note.. its a sad time where sch is concerned.. It'll probably be worse in 2weeks time.. probably it wont.. i dont know.. guess i'll go sleep nw.. again i'm mentally tired..

Saturday, October 23, 2004 . 1:44 AM

Spent the day home.. apparently it rained during the night.. as did other nights previously.. so i kinda slept very soundly.. woke up only around 2+.. played maplestory for the better part of the day.. tryin to distract myself from thoughts.. but cant.. totally couldnt concentrate on playing.. that would be gd or bad?? -.-"

received the results thru sms.. and.. well.. it made me feel worse.. wont say much detail abt it here.. lets just simply put that i failed one subj.. and i'll be goin thru the sup paper for it.. and if i fail it.. byebye poly friends.. byebye diploma.. byebye future.. shldnt be thinkin that negative yea i noe.. but these things just keep appearing in your mind.. i cant even concentrate on a special plan i've been tryin to think of for some occasion coming up..

haiz.. life's gettin bad.. very bad.. in almost all aspects of my life.. lord giv me strength to survive this..

Friday, October 22, 2004 . 2:05 AM

Today.. Just ate half a piece of bread. Yes.. half a piece of bread.. But thats just b4 i went out around 5pm.. Heh.. But still something which isnt gd as far as appetite's concerned..

As i was saying, went out around 5pm.. meet mei & alex.. went over to lavender to eat the claypot rice there.. They both said it was gd.. Recommended.. As for me.. Erm.. Well yea it's gd.. but for me nothings bad.. i'm not choosy.. unless its a realli CMI thing.. After that we walked over to Suntec since mei wanted to buy Dou Yu vcd.. And nx it was walkin to bugis.. Played 3 rounds of DM10.. cant help thinkin i just blew $6 lidat.. twice played Timepiece Phase II.. got 94% on both.. best part was i got 81% perfects and 13% greats on both.. Very nice coincidence. It wasnt the end of the day after that.. Walked over to parklane played billard awhile.. and a game of 6th mix.. Hi-hat totally gone.. lucky for auto hi-hat.. Took a 65 home from there.. i was seating alone.. therefore was in deep thought thruout the trip.. Caught naps once in awhile.. but thruout always thinking of someone.. Ya thinkin of denise.. my laopo.. Alex distracted me on the walk home.. kept mentioning about eating supper.. Which i didnt agree coz no appetite..

Results coming out soon.. Gd luck to me..

Thursday, October 21, 2004 . 1:51 AM

11days havent see her le..haiz.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004 . 1:14 AM

bah.. 4get abt havin fun this holiday.. i dun even hav places to go.. save $?? knn dun even hav $ hw to save.. save kilan.. to those who are having fun.. enjoy urselves.. this life of mine sux.. always has been.. lala.. k i'll nw go back to playing my game.. a very boring game.. but i still play it coz i got nth better to do.. =)

Monday, October 11, 2004 . 11:15 PM

hmm.. ok.. i'm back.. after so long.. well at least i THOUGHT it was long.. weird lehz.. oli 4days.. it seemed like 1week.. must be coz i stayed home for most of the time..

well.. holidays hav started.. no plans watsoever.. or rather wat i expected and hoped for didnt really turn out the rite way.. but no worries.. i'm just sad mayb.. to start off the holiday by staying at home and boring myself to death.. oh and to make me happier.. dad gave me only 10 bucks for this wk.. yes i'm so happy.. i'll probably go slap him and tell him to giv me the money he spends on his goddamn ciggarettes.. nb.. i'll definitely be able to put the money to better use.. rather den letting him spend the money just to buy something which lets him die faster.. then again.. mayb i wouldnt mind that after all.. nah i'm just joking.. or am i? =\..

anyways.. about the recent examinations that just passed.. i hope you all did well.. and i'm definitely sure u all did your best.. dont worry about results.. coz they aint gonna change.. thats the way it is.. and thats wat i've been tellin pple oso.. agree wif me rite?? =X as for me.. yea i just wish for a NO-FAILURE semester.. gimme all E or D oso can la.. pass ay sai liao.. i wan diploma de.. but i hav confidence in passing all.. =D

lets see.. any fixed plans so far.. hmm.. NONE.. =D.. i dun even hav a exact idea which dates i'll most prob hav to set aside in case oso.. rofl.. its a gd thing i guess.. anytime u all jio me go out i most prob wil on..

Thursday, October 07, 2004 . 3:39 PM

Went to do this test.. got it from my nuer blog.. hehe.. i though i was very antisocial lol.. but highly dependent is true if u read their definition of it.. scared of losing loved ones.. scared of throwing away old things which hav nice memories.. but i think those 2 traits most of us hav..

Disorder Rating
Paranoid: Low
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Moderate
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Low
Histrionic: Moderate
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: Moderate
Dependent: High
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate

URL of the test: http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mv
URL for more info: http://www.4degreez.com/misc/disorder_information2.html

Sunday, October 03, 2004 . 4:33 PM

eHhhH... duno y nw can post le .. erm.. mayb u all find it abit chim.. wat i mean by can post or cannot post.. aiya duno smlj bug go into my pc.. cant type in de text field for posting blog.. and its only here got such prob.. O.o".. anyways.. not tt much stuff happen oso..

last sunday 26/9/2004.. went out wif laopo.. but only for awhile.. sigh coz got wedding dinner den gotta be home by 6.45 lidat.. end up hav to leave cck (tts where we were) arn 5.30.. laopo wanted to take neoprint at de neoprint machine at de arcade there.. so spent quite some time there taking and designin de pics.. but the stupid machine gave us so little time to select which 4pics to keep out of about 10 or 12pics.. select 2 oli den time out le.. wtf -.-".. the person do dis thing no brain one ah.. knn.. make my laopo so dulan.. so later.. lol i reached home arn 7.. but nvm take taxi down so its still ok.. anyway weddin dinner.. normally start 30mins-1hr later den the stated time.. in this case they wan us 7.30 reach.. so.. you all do the calculating :P..

reach there.. met up wif some relatives.. toktok abit.. den they allow us to go into de ballroom to get seated le.. oh ya.. the dinner is at Shangri-la.. heh.. bo pian.. dis family rich.. =/ even got The Flying Dutchman to be the emcee for the ceremony.. O.o".. was abit stoning thru de whole ceremony.. lookin arn.. nice decor.. nice people.. thinkin of laopo.. and afew other stuff.. about 70% thru de dinner.. my cousins went to take a pic wif Flying Dutchman.. but i didnt join them.. was still stoning somehow lol.. when they came back.. became my aunty wanna take pic wif him.. den she pull my mom along.. den my mom ask mi come along oso.. haha den i went.. :P.. but the camera is wif them.. so i dont know when we'll get the pic.. i hope my mom will get it from them.. coz i wanna upload it hehe..

next.. 30/9/2004.. mei's bdae!! haha.. happy 18th bdae again mei..

exams coming soong.. 6th and 8th.. Routing and Switching , EDD respectively.. haven really done much studying.. i have to really force myself.. fuk why am i so lazy.. i really hope i wont fail any subj this sem.. *prays to god pls bless me*..

lastly.. the updates.. ok since i can post.. i'll go delete some of the tags i made.. abit messy le haha.. i'll be changing song.. now is stars in the night.. but .wma format laopo cant hear.. so i might change again.. but at any time sure got song de.. so if nth comes out after awhile.. might still be loading..