Sunday, June 27, 2004 . 11:56 PM
awwwz.. tired day.. woke up not very earli.. but it was a happy day.. guess i'm only tired coz used to slpin earli le.. which is a gd ting.. spent de day wif laopo.. coz its that time of the mth again.. no la not period.. its monthly anniversary.. hehex.. 3mth le.. its quite short.. but time passes so fast.. went to suntec to check out stuff for her event management thingy.. den walked to bugis.. went to buy movie tix.. The Chronicles of Riddick.. nice show.. =D.. den went to nua at arcade awhile.. den went to take neocard.. hehex.. coz we wearin same shirt.. wanna noe more mayb ask me show u de neocard lorz.. but den we took from that machine which u can add hearts and designs and stuff to de pic.. den the clothes got blended wif de background.. well actuali is only my shirt.. suay.. so my blue shirt bcum pink shirt.. didnt notice til it was too late.. den went to the cinema there nua til 7 den went back down to buy some tidbits.. lol bought sushi.. and back at de cinema there.. bought nachos.. machiam feast.. weee.. hhaha.. simple day.. but time passed fast as usual.. sigh.. spent abit of savings 2dae but i'll continue to save up.. many targets to meet as far as $$ is concerned.. =\Saturday, June 26, 2004 . 12:05 AM
back from bugis.. started off de day as usual by goin sch.. java lab.. still as boring as ever.. but i'm prepared for it.. coz i noe i gonna repeat it le so i'm used to it.. nw jux gotta brush up on wat i learnt previously so i wont 4get.. since i AM a 2nd-time student in this subj.. went over to cybercen to play some MU while waiting for laopo to finish arn 4-5pm.. as expected.. met drew there.. heh thx to him i hav access to de private china server for MU.. more cash.. more exp.. easy access to quest items.. basically its THE server to be at if u dont want to spend 12hrs a day,7days a week to level up ONCE.. repeat.. ONCE.. so yes.. ever since i stopped playing after beta.. nw i'm back to play it.. omfg went up to lvl150 in ONE DAY.. in 7+hrs only.. wahahah this rox.. and 2dae is de 2nd day.. lvl 186 le i tink..but spent abit of time upgrading items.. so nw i hav a full Black Dragon +11 set.. rofl.. so damn shining.. *blind liao*.. met up wif denise and shelina den follow dem go KFC eat.. den i and denise went to bugis coz she say wan go see bag.. saw my buttdy while walkin.. she didnt seem so surprised to see me.. quite unexpected coz i din see her for mths i tink.. oh well.. so as usual after her shopping.. we go down arcade see-see awhile.. and saw terry & his fren there.. den follow them go eat oso.. den went back arcade.. played afew games.. watched the usual House Of The Dead 3 pro.. seeing him play for more then 10times le.. but still damn nice to watch him play.. even i oso can memorize where those zombies come out from le.. haha.. so nw i'm bloggin.. later gonna play some d2 or o2jam or do some other stuff to delay time.. would wanna slp late but mayb i wanna get used to the sch life again.. body clock adjusted back le.. but not my mind.. grr.. den again.. its ALWAYS like that.. hahahaha.. so heck la.. :pThursday, June 24, 2004 . 12:58 AM
back from a relatively long day.. sch was from 11-1 only.. quite gd.. new subj.. new stuff to learn.. new stress.. >_<.. argh.. but i'm approaching this sem wif a new attitude.. so lets wish me all the best.. come on.. wish me NOW.. hahahhaa.. stoned at cybercen awhile til alex called me say can mit le so went down wif cck wif him.. spent de day there wif him,kel and nicholas til 10.30 den left for home.. didnt want to leave that late.. but last minute some other pple come play.. so we had to wait abit b4 we could have our last game.. sms laopo but den she only replied once.. she didnt noe i sms-ed her coz i wanted company.. den she din reply.. from mrt walk home so lonely.. so nw i'm bloggin.. and lata slpin.. 2molo schoolin.. gonna be a fukin long day.. thurs is my longest day in terms of lesson hours.. 9-12..den 2hr break.. den 2-7.. SIAN.. but wat to do.. i'm ok wif it.. like i said.. NEW attitude.. ROAR.. lalala..Monday, June 21, 2004 . 12:04 PM
Ok.. my cancerian stuff.. this'll be abit long but worth readin..Cancer is the cardinal water sign indicating that strong and rushing feelings and emotions guide their actions. When they love they love forever...period. Their extremely tough outer shell makes it hard to truly get into their heart but once in the loved one becomes pampered, adored and prone to being the intense focus of their feelings and moods. A Cancer lover instinctively nourishes and dotes on the object of their heart and can be all encompassing in all ways.
Being traditional and home oriented means male Cancers like to follow the proper rules and ways to court, to fall in love and to make it permanent. Likewise for females who tend to wait until the man makes his move regardless of how strongly they may want to make a move. No one can do love and give love like a Cancer can, but it is heart and maternally oriented as opposed to sexually oriented and its worse tendency is to be smothering.
A Cancer who feels insecure in a relationship is apt to become demanding: her sulking silently hurt or verbally making it clear what is wrong and why. The outer shell protects them from giving too soon and too often but those outer claws (another Crab attribute) serve to hold onto a loved one with a tenacious grasp that is almost impossible to break. Yet their actions are always driven by the true depth of their feelings and the loved one almost always holds a cherished spot in their heart even long after the union is over. When it comes to protection...not even Leo can outdo the fierce and loyal strength that a Cancer wields in the name of protecting a loved one
Cancer Sexuality Sex is not definable without emotions for most Cancers and they must feel something with relative strength for their truest feelings to come out in a romantic and sexual interlude. They are tender and partner oriented lovers and more concerned with pleasing their mates and feeling the returning emotions as nurturing proof of the partners love.
Sex for cancer is attached to all things which mean security and loyalty and truth of the heart. Their needs tend to fluctuate according to their moods and emotional state as does their intensity and their desire levels. In many ways sexuality is an empowered field for Cancer as they are the zodiacs maternal nurturers it is the literal act of sex which has molded their 'job'. A cancer who is in love and feels secure will intuitively understand that and will treat it as the joyful gift it is.
The Long Term Story In a solid, secure relationship a Cancer can easily support the nuances of a long term relationship as they naturally nourish and supplement the changing nature of the union.
On a lovers part it is important to understand their emotional vulnerability and how they cope with that through their built in defense mechanisms.
Cancers are, undeniably, prone to a certain moodiness and such is the way they can learn to bend and flow and give what is needed to nurture those around them. The more a partner learns to enhance a cancers ability to detach from what is going around them and to learn the truth of their own power of emotional freedom the less this natural moodiness will manifest in overt ways.
Positive Traits in Love Loyal, supportive, nurturing, compassionate, caring, dedication, faithfulness of emotions, tenderness, pampering, and adoration.
Negative Traits Possessiveness, jealousy, moodiness, volatility, control issues, dependency issues, depression
What a Cancer Likes Feeling appreciated, Sincerity, Tradition, Stability, Routine, Loyalty, Commitment, Laughing, Feeling
What a Cancer Dislikes Erratic ness, Sudden, unexpected changes, Insincerity, Being ignored, Dishonesty, Not knowing how you feel, Being uncomfortable
Cancer Love Keywords Emotional, fluid, nurturing, supportive, moody, insecure, loving, loyal, tradition oriented, modest, generous, sincere.
who knows exactly when i'm troubled and not?? who knows exactly when i'm feelin down and not?? who can look past that laughter.. that smiling face.. that shell.. and see the true depressed me..
Friday, June 18, 2004 . 2:04 AM
is it me.. or am i too sensitive.. i would wanna blog abt wat i did recently but i tink 2dae it'll be diff.. other stuff mayb.. i think i think too much.. i think about me thinking too much.. i noe i'm tinkin too much but i still tink too much.. should i even think that much?? thinkin so much can be useful at times.. but if i dont get calmed down in any way.. be it self-calming or anyone else calmin me.. i'll keep thinkin more.. think.. wonder.. analyze.. wateva u call it.. i finally realize wat bein alone at home can do.. it can make one think alot.. and wif this quiet environment of loneliness.. who wont? i always tot havin a sibling is bad.. fight for stuff.. fight for usage of comp maybe.. but ultimately its that bond.. i wish i had a brother or sister around my age.. can distract my mind from thinkin so much at home.. main cause of my depression moments now that i tink of it.. just not havin some1 to talk to when u wanna jux chit chat even.. =\.. or am i just dumb.. useless mayb.. sch's startin soon.. on the topic of sch.. ya im useless in sch too.. nt much frenz in my course.. less then 30(out of de whole cohort that is fuckin little).. nvr participate in anything at all.. yea i'm anti-social mayb.. sigh.. bloody financial prob.. no $ = cant spend $ = cant be trendy = dont look good = 1st bad impression to most pple = less frenz.. well the world is that practical.. and i'm to suffer from it.. i'm glad i do hav the frenz i hav nw.. i treasure each and every one of them.. as like a typical sign of the cancer.. the Crab.. the outer shell is of course of some level of displeasure.. but the inside is whats makes the cancerian shine.. i tink i'll go search that cancer description i found somewhere and put it here.. it'll be great.. back to the sch thing.. well sch's startin soon.. new semester.. and i plan to start afresh.. memories of the past will linger.. but i take it as a pointer to learn from.. bad things happen to 1 of my gd fren.. my brother.. wont say who.. i dont receive any updates from him anymore i dont know why.. but i'll always be praying for his welfare.. you know who u are.. aiyo dis post is gettin bloody long.. lots more to say but i stop here.. -end-Monday, June 14, 2004 . 3:01 AM
didnt charge hp ever since laopo left for penang.. reason coz my hp dead one ma.. so she not arn le i almost no nd to bother abt hp.. which was tru.. 4days.. oli 1 old fren come find me sms awhile.. den rayner change hp number.. tts it.. but oh dear.. 2dae hp went low batt.. and laopo kept callin.. so it meant that from abt 9+ all de way til i reached hm arn midnite.. she must hav been callin me alot of times.. kinda got her worried.. oh dear.. but its all ok after i got home.. chatted wif her.. ate my dinner.. fish and chips.. and nw bloggin.. started a new drummania card for e-amusement just now at cck.. 861pts liao.. wahahhaha.. all in one day.. and i oli played 9rounds to max out the 30 best-played songs which the card stores.. meanin in that new card i only played 30songs.. gonna work on these 30songs nw and try to squeeze the remanin 139pts out.. this new method realli rox... and works.. i guess.. its monday nw since i'm bloggin after midnite.. later gonna see whether laopo wanna mit anot.. tts if she goes out to do some stuff den can mit.. if not she's gonna stay at home to rest.. which is good too.. i miss her like crazy.. but of course i noe after a gd holiday trip u nd 1day at least to settle back down.. but i'll hope for the best.. hehehe.. *end*Saturday, June 12, 2004 . 10:41 PM
yey.. its the end of saturday le.. tahan ONE more day and i can see my dearest laopo le.. yea i told myself to keep myself as occupied as possible so time can pass fast.. but no matter what.. i still kept tinkin of her every hour.. awww.. heh.. woke up 3pm today.. wahahhaha.. supposed to go cck.. but in de end felt really tired.. den not much motivation to go play drums oso.. so didnt go.. mayb will go tmr.. just finished a whole day of d2.. mayb gonna bath later.. den play some other games.. probably a little gb or o2jam.. lalala.. one more day.. weeee.. *excited*Thursday, June 10, 2004 . 10:55 PM
sigh.. 2dae's oli de 1st day laopo is in penang.. and i already tinkin abt her whole day.. kept tellin myself its gonna be a quick 4-day period.. very fast will see her again le.. hahaz.. yea o2jam svr's down.. or mayb i just sway wanna play den svr down.. dowan to play den svr up.. coz i oli tried afew times den go d2 le.. abt 70% of de day spent in d2.. but didnt do much oso.. hp's especially dead.. didnt even remember about it at all til 6pm.. den i went to my bed where i put my hp.. tts how different it is without her around.. hp dead one.. but as long as she's havin a great time there.. i'm happy le.. k i'll go bath later den most prob play game again pass time.. will be slpin earli.. 2molo got *shudder* dentist appointment.. me got ugly teeth.. =/jux reached home.. left home arn 6+pm jux nw.. cheekeen called and jio me down to bugis.. so yea why not.. since 9pm gonna mit alex,nette,henry,mervin fisherman village.. so went down played 2games of drum.. den left for pasir ris.. had a crappin gd time as usual.. drank abit.. spent quite abit oso.. but i know i wont be out for the nx few days so its ok.. kind of balanced.. and nw i'm back from fisherman village.. most prob not slping so soon.. i wanna wait for my laopo's call.. she said she'll call me one last time b4 she goes off to penang.. i hope she does.. coz i'm waiting hehex.. i miss her sooooo much already.. how to tahan 4days.. =\.. yea i dont really feel sleepy now oso.. coz i just bathed.. always feel fresh after a bath.. so tts all.. will blog again 2molo..
Wednesday, June 09, 2004 . 3:30 PM
back liaoz.. appears dey needed to make appointments.. cant just step in and see de dentist lidat.. well i bochup anyway.. wasnt really in de mood to care.. anyway not my idea to go in de first place.. so made de appointment.. dis fri 2pm.. oh well.. guess it'll be something to do while my laopo's in penang.. i feel alot better nw.. most of my thoughts just went away suddenly.. its amazing hw the fresh air outside really makes me calm down.. ALWAYS.. =D.. well in today's case its more of raining air den fresh air.. but its gOOoOODDdd.. laopo leavin in abt 12hrs time.. yea she's takin de mornin flight.. sigh..laopo when u do come and read this.. just know i'm feelin almost perfectly ok liaoz.. and i'll miss u alot for these 4days.. but i hope you'll hav loads of fun there.. take care of urself ok?? *muacks*
2dae'll b de first time i post more den once in a day.. goin to de dentist nw.. used to hate it.. but now i heck care.. guess even goin to de dentist seems like a happy ting.. still thinkin of everything.. guess i hav to cheer myself up.. giv myself that encouragement blah blah blah..
didnt slp well.. woke up arn 5+ and couldnt slp til 7+.. den woke up every hour from 9am.. its funny hw de weather seems to complement my moods most of de time.. yes its rainin heavily nw.. sigh.. no sms in the hp.. feelin lonely.. all i nd is some support.. some reassurance.. some encouragement.. but havin someone tell u that is much diff from knowing what u nd.. it just feels much better.. afew words means alot to me.. i just woke up less then 30mins.. and its all coming back already.. and i thought a nite's slp would make me better.. oh well..